Let me set the scene –> I am driving (and I tend to be one of those people who can’t walk and chew gum at the same time, so I don’t like people yappin’ at me when I’m driving, talking on the phone, typing … you get the gist?)
Anyway, I have Lizzy (aged 7) along for the ride. She is watching some kind of cartoon in the van (mom-mobile –> if you you need a visual, you can go and watch “mom my ride” – I seriusly had the duct tape mirror for two years). OK, back to the darn story … sheesh … talk about going off on a tangent … oops! I am at it again and that is exactly why I have to concentrate on one thing at a time.
Sooooo … she is watching a cartoon and there is some kind of song about how
man humankind has come a long way.
Lizzy says, “Mom, do you think we’ve come a long way?”
“Hmmm, nope just a couple of blocks … sit back … QUIET … I’m driving,” I say!
Lizzy says, “NO Mom, since we were cavemen, do you think we’ve come a long way?”
“Ummm … yah, I guess … do you,” I ask?
Lizzy says, “yes, I think so.”
Breaks squeal …
“That effin’ son of a b-word cut me off,” I say!
My heart is pounding, and I feel really guilty.
“Sorry Lizzy, never tell anybody mommy said that … OK?” The guilt for being a fouled mouthed mother … makes me chatty (even though I am driving).
Note how I am worried that other people might find out, yet I forget to tell her not to use foul language herself –> mommyknows better –> SHAME!
“Why do you think we’ve come a long way,” I ask?
Lizzy says, “Well we invented electricity, matches, (there’s a pause) AND bear spray!”
“BWAAHAAHAA,” I laugh (LOUD)!
BEAR SPRAY … now how in the hell, did that get in the top frigging 3?
You have to love it … HAHAHA – Bear Spray!
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Man that daughter of ours is too much sometimes!
I love hearing about Lizzy’s conversations.She always has something interesting to say!
MK, my dear friend!
That is fantastic! And fantastically funny. Bear spray. I’m telling you, man, that Lizzy. She gets it. In Crabland it’s ALL ABOUT THE BEAR SPRAY and i am obsessed with it. I am terrified of bears. She’s right. that’s some damn fine invention!
I hear you, the girl is switched on and pretty fun to boot.