Back from the edge …

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“The edge of what,” you ask? Death! Yes, death … well OK I thought I was dying but of course I wasn’t. I had the flu, don’t laugh (I know I am sounding a lot like a man), it was a very bad flu that gave me a short stay in the hospital, 5 days in bed (might take one more), significant weight-loss (yippee) and the most horrific pains, aches, nausea and countless other things I can’t even begin to write about (not that talented and they are GROSS).

I woke Mr. MommyKnows in the middle of the night and insisted that he take me to the hospital. I was having trouble breathing and had back, neck and head pain that I couldn’t shake. I knew I was dying when I started crying. I don’t generally cry over physical stuff (I had a 10lb baby and didn’t cry)! So now all you girls know how bad I felt.

The ER seemed empty to me, but shortly after we arrived a couple arrived with a quiet smiling baby (probably 1st time parents – no offence I’ve been there). The staff assessed me said they had a bed and sent me over to check in. I tell Mr. MommyKnows that he can do it, I can’t breathe remember! So his wife is dying and he lets the couple with the happy baby go first! MommyKnows that you shouldn’t swear in public, but I think that I uttered something like “why did you effing let them butt in? Why don’t you just go home?” I guess, I should have told him he was advocating for me while I was dying.

They were right, just a few short moments later I was wheeled into the ER put in a room with a closed curtain and left to die. Well I was assessed by a nurse and my heart was monitored, but until a doctor looked at me there would be no drugs. FRICK … after 3 hours I decided it was time to go home (we have drugs at home … not the illegal kind but the prescription kind you save after surgeries, the dentist and childbirth because they might come in handy). Mr. MommyKnows saved us from having to fight security guards by finding the hospital pharmacy and buying me several over the counter medications which did help some.

I also want to tell you that I am not a religious person, but several times was heard to mutter “please God help me!”

Lucky MommyKnows was very near the main desk which only infuriated me more because I could see (through a crack in curtain) all the coffee, donuts and conversation that was being had by the so called “extremely busy” staff. Mr. MommyKnows tried to calm me down by telling me there were probably accident victims etc to be treated, but I knew better! I heard the staff discussing “BILL” and Bill was incontinent … when I heard them say that Bill had wet himself for the 2nd time with so much concern. I think I might have yelled “who cares if Bill pissed his pants … I am in PAIN!”

Finally, a doctor did show up and I was given all the tests, IVs, drugs (thank you dear Jesus … I am now frantically looking through the paper for a nice family church) and x-rays. Back to the drugs one of the drugs was ativan. I think they may have given me this one because by the time the doctor showed up I told her I was “feeling violent”. Hey, it’s important to tell the truth especially when you haven’t got a long time to live.

Diagnosis: FLU

I was sent home after being hydrated and with a prescription for painkillers and until today I haven’t even made it out of my bedroom. The aches and pains, became chills and fever, which turned into stomach stuff … oh man, it’s been the week from hell. Oh yeah it still hurts to breathe! And I am still wearing my hospital bracelet. It makes me look frail and kind of skinny if you just look at my arm (which is what I am doing).

I am shaky, but can finally focus on computer/TV with out getting nauseas. I haven’t had drugs since this morning and I had supper.

Thank you Mr. MommyKnows, Mom (for coming to the hospital so fast and taking the baby home with you), kids for being so quiet all week, Pam and Amy for holding down the fort at

If any of you live in my area, feel free to email me at MommyKnows at MommyKnows dot com and I will give you my address so you can bring over a casserole.

Categories: General


pauline · April 26, 2007 at 6:03 pm

REAL flu! That’s horrible! I had real flu once when I was 14 and also thought that I was dying. It’s not like “man-flu” at all – that’s just a sniffle that men get.

Real flu will wipe you out, just as you have described!

Poor you! You have ALL my sympathy (especially after the 10lb baby! Which one was that?)

kim · April 26, 2007 at 11:46 pm

Hey Pauline,

Real FLU … horrible.

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