The Giant Steps – Banff National Park
There are places in the world world, where you stand and feel so very small and insignificant.
It seems easy to feel humbled, in all the vast greatness of the outdoors, especially the Canadian Rockies. I think it is expected. Even welcomed? It puts all your worries and fears and disappointments into perspective. They are minuscule …
Truth, but then not. On the sofa in my comfortable home, those thoughts and worries can seem overwhelming. The insignificance disappears and becomes overwhelming. Feelings no longer feel minuscule or unimportant, they are HUGE and heart wrenching.
We continually hear the phrase, ‘life isn’t fair’. We say it, but do we truly believe it? I don’t think I do. You reap what you sow. We talk about karma, it’s so distant, and obtuse.
Can the ideas ‘life isn’t fair’ and ‘karma’, even coexist? Maybe, you can lose the battle, but win the war? It doesn’t seem fair, but perhaps it’s just the second act and justice hasn’t yet been handed out?
I have, I think lost the battle. I feel duped, cheated, misunderstood. They are not who I thought they were. Perhaps I wasn’t duped, perhaps my judgement is/was flawed? I made bad decisions, based on false reality. He is not kind, generous or good to ME. Of that I am certain.
I long to tell my side of the story, but you can’t raise yourself up by casting a shadow on another. This is surely the truth, yet at the same time I believe I have a right to tell my story. How can I do this? Today, I don’t know, so I will call this Part 1. I am sure there is a way, telling the truth, weighing both sides…
I’ve always written for the enjoyment of it. Stories to make you laugh, stories to make me laugh. Novels because they are more fun to write, than they are to read. How to’s, because I love to create and if I can do it, anyone can do it. Product spiels, because I have to pay my bills and feed my kids. Photos so you can see what I see.
However, I am going to tell my story. For catharsis, yet carefully, truthfully, and with forgiveness.